You’re enjoying dinner with a man you’d like to see again. Then he says he’s never been married, and you start wondering what you missed. At his age, shouldn’t he have made it down the aisle at least once?
If you’ve been divorced, his history can feel harder to explain than your own. You know what it takes to share a life with someone. Has he ever tried?
Give him a chance to answer. A previous wedding won’t tell you whether a man can listen when you’re upset or make room for you in his week. Those things take time to learn, whichever box he checked on his dating profile.
Let Him Tell You About Someone He Loved
Here’s a question that leaves room for his story: “I’d love to hear about a romantic relationship that felt important to you.”
He may have spent years with someone without marrying. Perhaps he wanted children and she didn’t, or he never wanted a marriage license. If you’re dating after 60, ask whether he’d make the same choice about marriage today. Hear how he sees those choices now.
Listen to how he describes his former partner. Does he remember what he appreciated about her? Can he explain why they parted without making her responsible for everything?
You don’t have to coll...